What pisses you off? Part 1 - conversation
Posted on April 1, 2007
Filed under British vs. American English, Idioms and slang, Listening, Upper intermediate |
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Introduction
Hello and welcome to Uncensored English! Uncensored English is an English learning podcast that teaches you the edgier side of the English language. My name is Lori, and I am the naughty person in charge of the show. At Uncensored English, we believe that mastery of a foreign language includes understanding its off-color, grittier side. And that’s what we aim to help you with.
Each episode of Uncensored English gives you two audio files to listen to. The first is an unscripted, natural conversation between native speakers, which provides natural examples of some of the vocabulary. This part is transcribed, and the transcription is available on the website.
In the second part, we present and discuss some related vocabulary, and give example sentences illustrating how it can be used. The vocabulary section is not transcribed, but we do give you show notes with all the important vocabulary and notes about usage.
Finally, before you listen, a warning: if you are offended by vulgar language or conversation topics, you should NOT listen to Uncensored English. And even if you are NOT offended by vulgar language, make sure to listen on headphones if you are in a public place or at work so that you don’t disturb people around you.
Are you ready?
Here we go with part 1: What pisses you off?
Conversation transcript
Lori: Are there any things that just really piss you off?
Michael: Would you like a list? There are many!
[laughter]
M: Err, no seriously, let me think…Yes the…something that I thought of today, when I was out walking the dog…umm…is when people let their dogs crap on the pavement.
L: Ahh.
M: This is something, you know I mean it…it’s disgusting, I always take a little bag with my doggie to clean up his mess, umm…and I think you can be fined if you let your dog take a dump on the pavement and there are special bins there for putting the mess into it but for whatever reason, some people, they just can’t be bothered or whatever, and it…it’s disgusting.
L: Yeah, I agree we have that same problem here in Sweden.
M: OK.
L: Except people are generally pretty good about, but even so, every now and then, you’ll see someone just not picking up after their dog…
M: Right, right and that’s…
L: …and it’s the same thing, they have special receptacles for putting the dog poo in.
M: right yeah, I’ve seen them, yeah that’s…
L: yeah, but you know, speaking of people not doing the right thing,
M: Mmm?
L: Ano– one thing that really, really makes me angry…it’s totally irrational but still it makes me…
M: OK
L: …really pisses me off, is when smokers stand right next to the ashtrays that are put outside of buildings…
M: Yeah?
L: and instead of putting their cigarettes in the ashtrays when they’re finished, they just throw them on the ground and step on them.
M: Even though there is an ashtray provided…
L: Even thought there’s an ashtray right there — and they’re big ashtrays because here in Sweden, you’re not allowed to smoke inside public buildings, so the smokers all congregate outside the entrance…
M: Aah
L: ..and smoke before going in, and there’s almost always these big ashtrays there for them to put their cigarette butts in…
M: Yeah
L: …but around the edges of these ashtrays, you always see tons and tons and tons of cigarette butts.
M: Oh yeah, that’s weird, I’ve…I’ve seen that…
L: Yeah
M: …with the little cigarette butts all in a…a pile on the floor around it, right, OK.
L: Yeah and I just…I don’t get that at all, why they do that.
M: No
L: And it’s so ugly and offensive looking, and smelly, that I…I just really don’t understand.
M: OK, OK
L: So that really pisses me off when I see that.
M: Right
L: OK
M: I thought of another one, umm…this is something…umm that I’ve realized over…I’ve known so many people who do this…umm. Do you know when you’re telling somebody a little…perhaps a little story or an anecdote that you think someone might find interesting, such as…errr…umm…let’s see… “When I went on holiday to Greece last year, the weather was 35 degrees,” and you’re telling them how hot it was, and rather than them responding with something like, “oh really? That’s interesting,” they have to respond by telling you that either they went somewhere where it was hotter than what you experienced, or if they didn’t do it themselves, they knew someone else, who did.
L: Right
M: You know, like, “My uncle Joe’s friend went to Zanzibar, where it was 40 degrees in the shade!”
L: Yeah
M: You know, whatever it is, it has to be bigger, better, faster, stronger or whatever than what it is that you said, when you know, you’re not starting this as a competition, but it’s almost like people see it as a competition, do you know?
L: Yeah, I call that “one-upmanship by proxy.”
[laughter]
L: I agree, it’s really annoying that no matter what…and you’re just making conversation…
M: OK
L: Just about simple things, umm…
M: Yes, exactly!
L: It can be anything, you could say, “Oh, I have a friend who went on a bicycle tour and rode from the northernmost point in Sweden to the southernmost point in Europe.” “Hah! That’s nothing! I know this guy who had a cousin, whose girlfriend who rode her bike around the world!” it’s like…
[laughter]
M: Yes! That’s…yeah! Yeah!
L: No matter what
M: If you ever meet that person, slap them! I hate that!
[laughter]
L: I know, it’s so…so annoying, ‘cause there’s some people who habitually just act that way, it doesn’t ma– I mean everyone might have an occasion to do that, just to make conversation, but there’s some people who habitually…
M: Sure.
L: …always have to say something to make them feel better, stronger, faster, even if it’s by proxy!
[laughter]
M: Yes, it’s someone else, they can feel proud of that, yeah!
L: Yeah! Oh…
M: It’s weird. So how about you, can you think of another one?
L: Uhhh…knee-jerk contrarians, what I like to call them.
M: Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah.
L: And knee-jerk contrarians are those annoying, annoying people who no matter what you say to them, they always have to put some kind of negative slant on it, or disagree, or point out a flaw, or…yeah no matter what.
M: Mmm hmm.
L: And it’s always the same people, and it doesn’t matter what you say, they will always, almost like it’s a knee-jerk reaction.
M: They have to disagree by default
L: Yeah, yeah, the default is “no.”
M: OK
[laughter]
L: The default is “you’re wrong.”
[laughter]
M: Right, whate– the opposite of whatever it is you’re saying.
L: Exactly!
M: Oh wow.
L: And those people, it’s the kind of people who will just suck the life out of any type of team project or…any type of…
M: Ah yeah.
L: …collaboration you’re doing on the job.
M: It’s very negative isn’t it? Umm…
L: Yeah, healthy skepticism and…and criticism is…is good, but that’s not what I’m talking about. Some people are just negative to the bone!
M: Yeah I think you see a lot of that sort of stuff on the Internet, you know, with forums and that sort of thing, um.
L: Oh forums, they’re the spawn of evil.
M: [laughs]
L: Lowest common denominator.
M: Right!
L: Don’t even get me started, in fact I think this is a good place to stop, because it will only go downhill from here!
[laughter]
Final words
Thanks for listening to part one of “What pisses you off?” In part two, Michael and I walk you through some of the vocabulary used in the conversation, and present lots more idiomatic vocabulary that you can use to talk about annoyances, irritations, and frustrations. The full transcript is available on the website, www.uncensoredenglish.com, and you can email us at uncensored [AT] betteratenglish [DOT] com. Bye for now!
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8 Responses to “What pisses you off? Part 1 - conversation”
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I guess this side of B@E is right up my alley!
Greetz Taz
Wheeee, you’re the FIRST to comment on the new site, Tazzie! (Apart from my mom, who snuck in a comment during the design phase.)
Wonder what you mum thinks about this site :)I am actually more than happy to learn the more colourful side of English which people use often rather than the pretty official british version we learn at school (one of my good friends who learnt only that went abroad for a month to England and was very surprised that she did not understand them well and vice versa, well, doesn´t surprise me…)
Hi Claire,
Anyway, glad you can appreciate the idea of the site. I wouldn’t encourage people to use vulgar language indiscriminately, but as you so rightly point out, vulgar language is frequently part of the jargon in many social groups. So an understanding of vulgarities is essential for real English mastery. And knowing what the words mean and how people might react to them, you can make informed choices about the language you want to use. I just hope people “get it.”
My mom loves the idea, but says that she’s probably not going to tell my grandparents about this site. That’s what spawned the idea about “Grandma safe.”
I love this site. Even though I consider myself rather upper intermediary where English is concerned, it’s always a good idea to check out what words are offensive.
In the spirit of “upmanship” … Some years ago, I was in a South American country with a lot of US and Canadian people. I somehow had too much to drink (amazing, since I usually do not consume alcoholic beverages) and apart from getting funny looks from the bartenders for talking Duck Language to them, I also got very funny shots from the hotel guests because I was f’ing the whole time. F’ing isn’t that bad in the Benelux. We’ll say F and S all the time.
Which brings me to a small question: would be okay to actually use offensive language on this website, just for conversation and educational purposes?
Hi Lori,
I love this site!
funny and interessting to hearyou guys’ opinions on what pisses you off as usual.
totally agree with those you guys talking.
I am from Korea and working for the company in Penang, Malaysia at the moment.
Before I came here, I was in Vancouver, Canada in order to learn English and work with English native speakers.
However I wished I did know this site earlier than when I found this!
Alawys thanks for great your job!
Hi, Lori, I m enjoying the website. I d like to be your friend. Are you swiss? I d like to know more about you. Thank you for helping us with our english.
Hi Lori,
How are you? I am fine. I would like to introduce myself, this is Zaman from Dhaka, Bangladesh.
From long time I searched for learning english web site and just two/three days back I have found your fantastic site, which is so much helpfull for me. I am enjoying you & Michael ’s conversation.
And I will continue it for my betterment.
I am inviting both of you and Michael to visit Bangladesh.
I will be happy if you send e-mail to me for once to let me know about your details.
Thanks and take care.
Zaman